If I ever went on a social-media-based reality show, I don't think anyone would call me a baddie for my use of hashtags

*listening to the Swollen Members* Wow... they're rocking me! My shit's getting blown back. I wonder if I could do it like them... *listens a bit more* Oh, they're saying I probably can't

Okayy! If music REALLY be the food of love, FINE. Play on, I GUESS

An #RSS feed has been implemented! Time for the XML revenue to really start flowing in

Everyone has gas lawnmowers around here! So loud, ugh. Get a pushmower *later* OK what the HELL is that rattling sound

I hate when food is marketed as “fun” like c'mon, it's a cup of instant noodles not Crash Team Racing

When I mess up currency formatting in Ruby, I don't give up... eventually I'll go for round(2)

I always have at least 2 businesses in my back pocket in case the current one fails spectacularly

Got this productivity strategy where I'm not allowed to turn off Curb Your Enthusiasm until I've completed the task

Sad little folder on my desktop called Self Care that I never remember to open

Couldn't quite get my accounting caught up and taxes in before the deadline this year, but it's kind of freeing... now I've got a whole extra month until the fine gets bigger

Wrecking entire rooms for myself simply by using them as workspaces for memorably awful projects

If cyclists had the reputation of carrying grenades I think drivers would give us a bit more space on the road

#RSS capabilities coming to Mirth Turtle Social soon! Then you can delete your browser

There is now a Go airline

https://www.mirthturtle.com/airline

AI isn't gonna take my job... I'm perfectly capable of torpedoing my career myself, and also technically I'm unemployed already

Fishing reality shows are great if you want to see two tons of fish die and some asshole who's emotionally abusive to his employees being like “That's what i'm TALKIN about BABY”

Attempting to change my personality by watching Suits at max volume and yelling “You should have come to me first!” along with the named partners

Soon

Taking “vacation” this week by only playing the most boring computer games and not thinking about terrifying AI

Pulping up and re-constituting all my unsuccessful Mastodon accounts into Mirth Turtle Social like a questionable luncheon loaf

Sorry about all this. I was never in indie bands when I was younger so I didn't get a lot of bullshit out of my system

I'd appreciate if no one shares any posts because I really don't have the mental energy to go viral right now